positively positive (:

I’ve realized that I’ll always have this positivity once my vacation period starts. It was not always so, because in primary and secondary school, regardless of school or holidays, I’ll generally feel alright. Life was carefree back then. The more “highly educated” I became, the more I hated school. I hate the system of meritocracy and the endless gossips and drama that plagues the environment. I hate not knowing who I can trust, always being on my guard and watching my back.

but, I realized it wasnt about where I studied or worked or lived. Its the fact that as we grow and “mature”, the competitiveness emerges; the need to ‘leave a mark’ and forge an identity consumes us and become maliciously/viciously competitive. Very often, being normal people, normality makes us mundane and forgettable. Hence a normal person often finds it easier to be abnormally nasty, obnoxious, overly vocal and overly prone to over sharing. A bunch of normal people flock together to indulge in abnormal amounts of malicious small-minded discussions about a person, perhaps, and very often somebody they are secretly jealous of but refuses to admit.

anyways, I realized the best way to be neutral is to be silent. sure, you get bad-mouthed once in awhile for being silent or anti-social. but when you are barely seen, you provide close to zero information to fuel the gossips. normal people throw rocks at things that shines. it is very true. a certain junior in school that I respect is often the target of mockery, bully and gossip but has never faltered or become cold or hard. I respect that. (:

holidays are awesome (: I can be away from those people for awhile. And I can do things I want for awhile

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